Cohabitation- Try it Before You Commit

Over the Christmas season I have seen many commercials and as these commercials were played over and over again, my wife and I came to the decision that some things just don’t need to be advertized, such as, condoms.  This commercial was aired about 500 quadzillion times and may have led to some very sensitive conversation between some parents and their little children.

Many of the new shows coming to television were also being advertized and I noticed that a bunch of them center around relationships and involved sex with non-married people.

It never ceases to amaze me how society will watch entertainment television and movies that involve sexuality with no boundaries, accept those “no boundary” values and live them out in their own lives and then wonder why their personal lives and society produces negative results.  Results like high divorce rates, broken families, expectations that everyone will eventually cheat on the other, and a host of others.

A few of the commercials we viewed over the past few weeks allow the customer to try the service for thirty to sixty days before committing to purchase.  Sadly a large number of people treat marriage with the attitude.  They say, let’s try it to make sure we are meant for each other.  What these people don’t understand is that once they make this decision they have nearly committed themselves to ending their relationship or if they do marry, to divorce.

When we enter a marriage, that marriage should be about serving our spouse; sadly most are about serving “me.”  Matter-of-fact we should be focused on serving our spouse long before we marry them or even know them.

Cohabitation is not about serving our spouse, but is all about being served.  This is the main ingredient for an unsuccessful marriage.  Lifechurch.tv did a sermon series titled, “Growing to the Chapel,” and they produced a great video that sheds light on this issue in a bit of a humorous way.  If the video speaks to your heart, I would suggest looking up the sermon series and listening.  Let’s reconsider trying out a wife or husband before we actually commit, let’s reconsider “shacking up.”

What Good is it to Me Now?

“What good is it to me now?”  This is what Esau said to his brother Jacob one day when he came in from a long hunt and was very hungry.  Jacob was cooking up some food and Esau asked for some, but Jacob saw an opportunity and proposed a trade, some of the food he prepared for Esau’s birthright as the eldest son.  The birthright was something that would come into effect when it came time for their father to die and considering Esau knew that most likely that would not happen for many years, he said, “What good is my birthright to me now?” (Gen 25)

Esau was hungry right then, he needed to relieve his hunger immediately, so he agreed.

In Hebrews 12, the writer encourages the believers to not be “sexually immoral or Godless like Esau.” Esau’s decision to trade his birthright for a single meal is paired with being sexually immoral.  It is pointed out that when the time came for him to receive his father’s blessing (birthright) he was not able to due to his decision and regardless of how much he cried, Esau was not able to take back his choice.

We are sexual beings and we all have sexual desires, but Scripture points out that sex is meant to be something that is shared between a man and a woman within the commitment of marriage.  I encourage the single man and single woman to not trade the bonding and intimacy of sex to meet an immediate desire regardless of how strong that desire feels, in trade for the specialness that comes with marriage.

Esau thought that his birthright didn’t matter because it would not happen for such a long time, even if your marriage may not happen until you reach retirement years, I encourage you to not repeat Esau’s decision because no matter how much he cried…no matter how much you may cry, you will not get back that same specialness.